Nearly every day, doubts about her self-worth attack the most tender, vulnerable part of your wife’s soul—her image of herself. Many wives default to feeling inadequate, to dwelling on their imperfections, to doubting their worth, to a quiet depression because of feelings of inferiority. These oppressive thoughts do great harm to her soul because she is designed to need to be cherished. When you see a woman who knows she is the delight of her husband, you see a woman who glows with feminine charm, beauty, grace, confidence, and love for others. You see a joyful woman who is flourishing in the use of her God-given, feminine gifts.
Would your wife say that you treasure her? Do you appreciate her unique gifts? Do you value her opinions? Do you delight in the beauty of her body and soul? Are you grateful for the way she loves and serves you? Do you see the hidden treasure that is her soul--to be discovered and enjoyed day by day?
When God commands a Christian husband to cherish his wife (Eph. 5:29), God is assigning him the task of shielding his wife from the relentless assault she experiences on her self-esteem. It is the role of the bridegroom to delight in his bride. “As a bridegroom rejoices over his bride, so will your God rejoice over you.” (Is.62:5)We are to delight in our bride all the days of our lives, just as our bridegroom delights eternally in us.
Are you still delighting in your bride? Perhaps over time, the dust of the ordinary has settled over the wedding pictures in the hallway. The agent of familiarity has caused you to take your wife for granted. This agent won’t steal your wife from you; he’ll just paint your relationship with a familiar coat of drabness.
If you need help treasuring her more, you might take a few moments and think through what your life would be like if she were killed in a car accident this afternoon. How would your life change? What would you miss most about her? When you look into her aged face, remember that this is the creature who gave you her youthful beauty, along with the best years of her life. Called to be a suitable helper to YOU, her heart yearns to know that YOU think she is doing her job WELL.
“He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord" (Prov. 18:22).You might want to take a few moments to enumerate to God the many ways your wife is a blessing to you. Perhaps like I do, you might need to repent of not treasuring her as you should. Perhaps treasuring her and making her feel treasured need to become a higher priority!
