As God-designed men and warriors, we need to know how the idea that gender is a social construct is corrupting the very children singing this weekend and next about Mary, Joseph and baby Jesus. If we do nothing, many will reject God’s gender design and bring enormous pain into their lives. Mary, the mother of Jesus is a striking example of all that God designed a woman to be. We need the daughters of Christ to SEE THAT. This episode makes some suggestions about defeating transgender ideology in the public arena of ideas and then takes a close look at Mary, a paragon of godly womanhood that the daughters of the church need to admire.
God has created us to fight to spread Christ’s kingdom of truth over earth AT THIS CULTURAL MOMENT. The battle to protect our wives, kids, and others is fought in the world of IDEAS. The weapons of our warfare have divine power to destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ (2 Cor. 10:5). Notice the four words in this description of battle that have to do with thinking correcting—arguments, opinion, knowledge, thought. Satan, the father of lies follows a simple strategy—darkening human understanding. However, God, the author of truth is the designer of math, logic, and an orderly world. He is the divine LOGOS, says John. This term, from which we get the word logic represented the organizing principle of the universe, in Greek philosophy. We need to be certain that the rising generation understands that anti-biblical views are always going to fail logically, but they may need help in seeing this flawed logic. Here are some examples of flawed thinking about gender identity.
A. What Our Kids are Hearing. GENDER IS A SOCIAL CONSTRUCT. You must ask a person for his gender identity because gender identity and biological sex (called “sex assigned at birth”) are unrelated, meaning your body has nothing to do with your gender. We’re told that some people are born into the wrong body.
Response. The desire to support a friend, especially one who is ridiculed for being T is both understandable and Christ-like. Christians ought to be known for befriending transgender people because they have inestimable worth as those made in God’s image. Furthermore, usually we win others more to a biblical view by loving them well than by persuading them of their faulty thinking. However, real love is never separated from truth. Here is a response to transgenderism.
- Transgender ideology attempts to base reality on the subjective feelings a person has instead of biologic and genetic reality.
- Feelings don’t determine reality anywhere else in life. We don’t allow our feelings to determine our height, weight, eye color, skin color or shoe size. Those are objectively determined for us at birth. Even if we are adopted, we can’t change the DNA that shapes our eye color, height, weight, and shoe size. That is REALITY. That reality doesn’t change according to how we FEEL about it. Feelings don’t determine gender either.
- Our DNA determines our gender. Every single one of a girl’s 37.2 trillion cells is marked with XX chromosomes. She IS a girl. To feel and think otherwise is to live a delusion.
- A person in a girl’s body who thinks she is a boy is deluded. This disconnect from reality is called psychosis: Here is the Mao Clinic definition of psychosis: A mental disorder characterized by a disconnection from reality. If my three-year-old child sees a cartoon with people flying and goes to the top of the steps planning to dive down the steps because she can fly—even her eight-year-old brother knows he needs to stop her, because she is deluded about reality. It may hurt her feelings to tell her she can’t fly. But that is reality. To allow her to believe a delusion and dive down the steps is cruel.
- Thin people who feel overweight, when in reality they are not, are called anorexic. They are deluded. Correct medical treatment is not to affirm their delusion. It’s cruel to affirm their identity as too fat and watch them starve. Such people need professional help. The way to be kind is to help them see themselves as they actually are.
B) What Our Kids Are Hearing: There are more than two genders. The idea that there are just two genders is old-fashioned and proven wrong by the fact that some people are born intersex.
Response. It’s true that rarely, some reproductive systems don’t develop properly along male or female lines. This condition is a DISORDER of sexual development, not a NEW gender.
- Some people are born without limbs. Some are born blind. Some are born with extra chromosomes, others with missing chromosomes.
- Disorders of sex organ development are not evidence of a new sex category any more than disorders of the cardiac or respiratory system are evidence of a new kind of heart or lung. Miss shaped genitalia is not a new sex category.
- The intersex condition is a disorder of sexual development, not a new gender. Every part of our body risks developing imperfectly: brain, heart, lungs, appendages, including our reproductive systems. Sexual deformities create no new chromosomes, sex hormones, or genitalia.
- Miss shaped sexual organ disorders do not replace the normal reproductive process that takes both a male and a female. They are simply evidence that sometimes our bodies don’t develop or function as designed.
- The intersex condition is real, and like every physical variation from the ideal, those who face this condition are worthy of all dignity as human beings. But a disorder of sex organ development does not produce a third gender.
The High Cost of Cowardly Silence About Gender Identity
Background. Gender dysphoria, formerly known as “gender identity disorder,” has long been a recognizable mental disorder. According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Disorders, published by the American Psychiatric Association in 2000, it is characterized by a severe and persistent discomfort in one’s biological sex. It typically begins in early childhood, ages 2-4, although it may grow more severe in adolescence. 70% of childhood gender dysphoria resolves on its own. Historically, it has afflicted .0001 of the population, almost exclusively boys. Before 2012, there was NO scientific literature on GIRLS ages 11-21 having gender identity dysphoria. Wall Street Journal writer, Abigail Shrier, who makes no claim to being a Christian, conducted extensive research on the current transgender craze among teen girls. She found that this transgender craze is very different from past forms of gender dysphoria:
The phenomenon sweeping teenage girls is different. It originates not in traditional gender dysphoria but in videos found on the Internet. It represents mimicry inspired by Internet gurus, a pledge taken with girlfriends—hands and breath held, eyes squeezed shut. For these girls trans identification offers freedom from anxiety’s relentless pursuit; it satisfies the deepest need for acceptance, the thrill of transgression, the seductive lilt of belonging….The American family…finds itself set in a society that increasingly regards parents as obstacles, bigots, and dupes. (Society) cheers as teenage girls with no history of dysphoria steep themselves in radical gender ideology taught in school or found on the Internet. Peers and therapists and teachers and internet heroes egg these girls on. But here the cost of so much youthful indiscretion is not a piercing or tattoo.
The cost is so much higher. This epidemic of gender dysphoria is not only leading to irreversible “top surgery” and infertility; the internal psychological fracturing that comes from trying to split apart self-identity from one’s physical body leads 41 % of those who identify as transgender to commit suicide (compared to about 1.2% in the overall population). Transgender ideology’s attempts to blame this astronomical suicide rate on the lack of acceptance of transgenderism as normal are not credible in the world of statistics. More importantly, blaming others for not further enabling transgender delusion does not change the fact that 41% of those who buy into this delusion end up committing suicide. We can not allow the daughters of our families, churches, and nation to travel down this path!
Behind much of today’s gender confusion is the loss of the glory of God’s design of male and female differently, having strengths the other gender doesn’t, so that man and woman need each other to complete our assignment as God’s image bearers. In the OT and NT the callings to masculinity and femininity are different. Mary, the mother of Jesus is an awesome picture of femininity that we need to inspire the rising generation of girls to aspire to.
Mary—Beautiful Femininity as It Was Designed to Be
Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the PURITY and REVERENCE of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a MEEK and QUIET SPIRIT, which is of great worth in God’s sight. (1 Pet 3:1-4). Here, four characteristics of inner feminine beauty are laid out—and each one is visibly lived out in Mary the mother of Jesus.
Meekness: The Greek word PRAUTES is used to describe the strength of a spirited horse, which yields to the control of its rider. This inner heart attitude of surrender to the Lord makes a woman beautiful, says Peter. And we see this heart in Mary—in spades. We see it in her spontaneous song, called the Magnificat, when Elisabeth the wife of Zechariah greets her. “My soul magnifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has looked on the humble estate of his servant. For behold, from now on all generations will call me blessed; for he who is mighty has done great things for me” (Luke 1:46-49). This heart attitude of surrender to the Lord’s will is apparent in her immediate response to Gabriel’s words, “Behold! I am the handmaiden of the Lord. Be it unto me according to your word.” Michael Card, in his commentary on Luke comments,
Of all that she does not know, one thing seems perfectly clear to her. It is a perspective that will help her navigate the deep waters into which the small vessel of her life is about to go. It will be the source of her disturbingly clear obedience. She perfectly articulates this fundamental reality with her first response to the angel’s troubling news, “I am the Lord’s slave.” Different translations soften the language. Some render the word DOULE (feminine form of DOULOS) “servant.” Others use the even softer “handmaiden.” But Mary is affirming that she is the slave of the Lord. She is surrendering her rights, her hopes and dreams and her own body absolutely to him. Mary seems to know that she is owned by Another.
A Quiet Spirit. Back in I Peter 3, the Greek word Peter used for quiet was HESUCHOIOS, which indicates tranquility arising from within, causing no disturbance to others. Having a quiet spirit means being at rest inside. Mary does ask Gabriel how she could be the Messiah’s mother since she was a virgin—a simple inquiry that Gabriel seems happy to answer. Unlike Zechariah, the father of John, Mary does not doubt Gabriel’s words, but quietly trusts God to work out the details of her life. Her confidence in God to work out everything for her ultimate good is the key to her contentment. Her trust in God’s goodness makes her content with the circumstances over which she has no control. Mary’s quiet confidence that God’s words and promises are trustworthy comes out in the closing words of the Magnificat, He has helped his servant Israel, in REMEMBRANCE of his mercy, as he spoke to our fathers, to Abraham and to his offspring forever.” God remembers, i.e. keeps his promises. He is utterly trustworthy and that confidence in the heart of a woman makes her beautiful.
Purity. Mary and Joseph, though engaged, were virgins. In a world that will scorn the daughters of our church for saving sex for marriage, we need to protect their hearts from the lies of Satan and the culture. As we guide our adolescents into an accurate understanding of sex, we need to help them see:
- That sex is exhilarating, heart-pounding fun and enormously pleasurable.
- That in the context where God places sex, between a married man and woman, God urges them to drink often and deeply of sexual pleasure. (Song of Solomon 5:2).
- That their instinctive feeling of discomfort when they are naked in the locker room or doctor’s office tells them something. It causes them (and the medical staff) to quickly cover their private parts. We need to help our sons and daughters realize that this God-given instinct to quickly cover up our nakedness is intended by God to protect us. It reminds us of the moral law written on our hearts that naked vulnerability is to be saved for marriage.
- That when a human exposes his nakedness, especially his private parts to another, that exposed human is vulnerable to enormous psychological damage if that nakedness is not valued, cherished, and loved. If, after the exposure he does not feel loved unconditionally the internal rejection is psychologically traumatic. That is why rape is so emotionally devastating. It is the most profound of all violations of one’s personhood.
- That God protects the inner recesses of our private souls and bodies from being irrevocably injured by the rejection of another human, by requiring that I only reveal that nakedness to one who has vowed before, God, the state, the church, my family and my friends, that we will both unconditionally love each other for life--entering the covenant of marriage.
- That having sex with one who is not committed life-long to unconditionally loving you, but moves on, is like two pieces of paper being glued together and then trying to tear those papers apart again. Both souls gets torn. But the damage is internal, so we might not even realize the harm to our soul that has been done.
- That the full biblical view of sex might explain why the intimacy of sexual union is so emotionally, physically, and spiritually powerful. Might it be because God designed sexual union not only to be the richest of blessings for humans to enjoy, but as a type, the explosive pleasure of which points to the immense pleasure of that will one day be ours in our spiritual union with Christ our bridegroom?
- That it is Christianity’s high view of sex as precious, the ultimate expression of vulnerability, and of giving one’s whole self to another, that lies behind its teaching that it be saved for marriage. The high biblical worldview of sex makes so much sense! Gloriously, Mary, the mother of Jesus was sexually pure. Such purity was NOT because she never had sex, as some in the Roman Catholic church believe. It is because she didn’t have sex until marriage. (Jesus had four brothers and at least two sisters.)
Reverence (Fearing the Lord, Not Man). Peter’s command to Christian women is to disregard what anyone thought of them but God. Peter commends reverence. The Greek word is PHOBIA. In context, it refers to the fear of the Lord rather than the fear of man concerning fashion. Christian women don’t pursue beauty based upon the culture’s latest fads: Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes (vs 3). Archeologists have found numerous portraits and sculptures from first century Rome showing elaborate braiding of women’s hair and the wearing of ostentatious jewelry. Peter is not saying to women, “Look frumpy and wear outdated clothers for Jesus,” but that the one they should most want to look beautiful for is their Lord. Rather, your beauty should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty which is of great worth in God’s sight (vs 4). When we look at Mary’s Magnificat, we see her lifting up those who FEAR the LORD rather than fearing man. She exalts the upside-down values of God’s kingdom people in contrast to the wrong values of the fallen world:
And his mercy is for THOSE WHO FEAR HIM from generation to generation. He has shown strength with his arm; he has scattered the proud in the thoughts of their hearts; he has brought down the mighty from their thrones and exalted those of humble estate; he has filled the hungry with good things, and the rich he has sent away empty (Luke 1:50-53).
I believe that only heaven will reveal the true beauty of Mary’s determination to fear God rather than men. When she allowed God to make her pregnant without being married, the price she paid in her legalistic, Jewish, small-town community must have been staggering. As soon as she began to show, the tongues must have started wagging—that Mary girl seems really pious, but if you ask me, she and Joseph have been messing around! How many jokes would have been cracked about Mary and Joseph’s explanation for the pregnancy? Into the only home she knew and only extended family she had, she brought enormous shame in a town where everyone would know about her out-of-wedlock pregnancy. It is hard to image one suffering the rejection of her community any more severely. The town elders were so moralistic and committed to their Jewish ways that when Jesus came back to Nazareth, thirty years later and confronted them with their racist hostility towards unclean gentiles, they tried to throw him off a cliff. Mary and Joseph would have appeared unrepentant over their fornication. Might they have been thrown out of the synagogue? Mary chose to fear God, not men. We need to help our daughters realize that true beauty in God’s eyes, and even in human eyes is the inner confidence of a woman who is too strong to yield to peer pressure but, instead, stays true to the loyalties of her heart.
What might happen at your dinner table during the Christmas holidays if you asked, “How do you think Mary is a good example of womanhood for young girls today to follow?” Do have a merry Christmas. In 2022, may we all come to know Jesus more deeply, love him with greater loyalty, and fight for his honor more passionately.
For Further Prayerful Thought:
- Why is it important for Christian men today to take a stand against the transgender ideology spreading across our schools and nation?
- How would you seek to be persuasive about the harm of transgenderism in the public arena of discussion?
- How could you do a better job of encouraging the women in your life when they demonstrate beauty of heart--especially meekness, having a quiet spirit, purity, and wanting to please God rather than men?
